Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Giving Up

It's possible you may disagree.
From where I'm standing, I can say for sure, there are and will always come, days when you feel like giving up.
Like that's an option?

I can see you feel out of it. You're tired and unmotivated.
Your sugar levels have been up and down and you're just feeling so out of it, getting back in bed and pulling the covers over your head seems a lot better that getting up and opening the door that leads out to reality.

Sunny day or cloudy day doesn't matter much when you feel like hanging up the gloves and the fight to keep going seems loss. You don't want to hear advice, especially not from people who can't possibly know what you feel because they're not you.

You're the one that has to get pricked, punctured, checked, injected, made to bleed and monitor what you eat. 
Tired. Sick and tired of being tired.
No, wait...

There. You said it. Now you just want to be left alone.
But, if you know me, you know I can't walk away, at least not immediately without saying at least this...
I'm sorry you feel crummy.  I'm so sorry you are having such a bad day. I love you and really care. There are more people around you that love you. But, please,
Don't give up. Don't quit. Don't resign to what you believe is the end, because it is not.

Yes, you're tired and you're right. The constant needles and poking holes into your fingers and toes to check your sugar have become more than a nuisance. 
Through it all, through this pain and anger, you are still you, an amazing and wonderful you who has so much to share and give those around you.

You are life to those who know you.
You make us smile and laugh and feel thankful for you.
When you feel crappy, call one of us, talk to us or just tell us you need someone to just walk with you quietly. I can do that. I can just sit with you if that's what you need.
I'll be quiet. 

You can talk if you want to and I'll listen.
Maybe we can think of some jokes, well, I sort of suck at telling jokes, but maybe you can pretend to laugh at them. I just want to see you loving life the way I know you do.

You have your whole life before you and giving up is not an option for someone like you.
Sickness is just in the way sometimes but I know you will make it. I have always believed in you, so much.
Get up.
Let's go for a bike ride or just hang out in the park.
Come on.
Roller Skates, skateboard, jogging, whatever you want to do, let's do it.
At the end of it all, I just want to say, "Don't give up."
I will never give up on you. I know God has a great plan for your life. I will believe in healing for you and never quit.

Inspired by my son's comment, "Mom, I'm just tired of this. You don't understand.I know you love me but it's not you getting this." And he is absolutely right.

#jacobduran #jacobdiabetes #type1diabetes #diabetesmanagement #diabeticchild #insulin #diabeticdepression #diabeticliving #diabeticblog #diabetesblog #encouragement #diabeticcounseling #familycounseling


  1. Wow, I'm amazed to find your blog. I'm also a mom of a T1D son, Jacob who plays football. :-) He played in high school, then for the University of Wisconsin and then into the NFL.

  2. Thank you Holly. I am always happy when God brings and adds new people into my life. Jacob is now getting ready to enter 8th grade. Wow! I am happy your son has made it to High School and beyond. You're a great mom. Welcome to the familia.