Tuesday, April 24, 2018


As I sit in an orange chair this morning, my eyes and my thoughts are focused on the faces around me. Some are just like me, sitting, waiting, wondering, and others are in obvious discomfort, pain, and worry. Sitting in this chair I realize where I am and all the different outcomes that can take place while sit here waiting. I ponder on the things that will happen and the news at the end of my minutes passed taking up space in this waiting room, along with so many others.

It is here in this chair that words begin to pour into my thoughts from a familiar place, inviting me to think of another seating place. My mind takes me to a chair, a chair found in the throne room where the Lord of Lords and King of Kings sits, enthroned over all the earth and the heavens. He is sitting there completely at ease. To look at me one would imagine looking down into the Earth and being able to identify one super tiny dot out of thousands of other dots that are really His creation, His children. I am one of them. There on His throne, He sits being able to see me, to know why I am here, and knowing every thought that is passing through my mind.

God sits on His majestic chair and smiles. 

Earthquakes shake the foundations of the world. Furious winds turn oceans and everything on Earth into spinning tops. Humanity is going crazy with rumors of wars, fighting against one another and not ever being happy or satisfied with what they have. Protestors fight for their rights and others seek to remove the Bible from existence and still, through it all, God knows where to find me, in this room, on this chair.

We all sit on chairs, different kinds, while the turmoil and the whirlwinds take us for a spin. Sometimes even our faith gets moved to see if we are going to stand and believe. 

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We are on chairs that hold us in our fears and in our pain. God sits on a chair that is not moved by our frailty and our unbelief. He sits unmovable, unchanging and unable to lose even a hair of power. He sits securely to remind us to be assured that He is with us. He sits up tall and confident to remind us that we are not alone in the waiting room of our lives. He sits robed in splendor and majesty so that we can look upon His love and be filled with that love that changes the hardest heart and heals the broken spirit.

This morning, I've spent a long time in this chair. I know what is coming and I knew some of what would come my way. Many of you sit in a chair of waiting and despair. Maybe it's a dialysis chair you wish you could pull the machine off and run, run, and run quickly away and away and never return. Maybe you're on the train full of people that are hurtful with their words and attitude and your stress level has hit the ceiling and you're desperate to get out. You feel like you can't breathe because you have so many worries on your mind. Maybe you sit on a chair of feeling like a failure. It's easy to sit in this chair when you see your child going from bad to worse and you begin to hear that voice that says, "It's all your fault! You should've been more aggressive in making him check his sugars. You should have forced him to try new foods. Failure!" 

But, this morning as I rise up, ready to head home, I no longer sit in that chair of waiting because the Lord showed himself to be sitting on my side, ruling in my favor and reminding me His voice is the only voice that matters. If you're like me, maybe you've worried and wondered about a lot of things, even when you have faith and believe. I think God allows these hard moments in our lives to see where we stand and where we shall continue to sit and stand. Will we run and abandon our faith the moment the news is negative and we have to live with more challenges? Will we go from believing God to blaming God and denying His power or will we accept this new moment in our lives and use it to get closer to the Lord, really learn how to pray and seek His face and hunger after Him, trust Him and wait for a miracle. I still believe in miracles. 

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Throughout the coming weeks, there are many more chairs waiting for me. Most of those chairs are cold, hard and have been used over and over by people who have made on of two decisions. They've accepted the challenge life has delivered and decided to fight with faith in their hearts and God in their lives, or the pain has been too great, the loss has been felt immediately and they've lost the battle way before they even started to get up and leave the waiting room.

As the weeks go by and I find myself in one of those many waiting rooms, each room will be a reminder of prayer room, a room for seeking the One who sits on the Throne, an invitation to enter in to the Throne Room with Him. Each time I sit in the waiting room, I will see my family and our situation wrapped in garments of royalty, claimed by the King, and covered by His mercy. I will not fear this chair, for it will become my comfort and my joy as I walk through the valley of shadow and death, and fear no evil, for the Lord is with me. He is with my family. He is with you and your family as you go through your difficulties 

Do not give up! Hold on and never lose hope. God is not shaken and confused by our problems. God is not overwhelmed and stressed by our anxieties. He invites us to sit before Him and be at peace and that is exactly what I intend to do. We will lost many things. Moments spent on the chair will cause us to be our or that chair we occupy as work or school and cause us to lose money or time of learning. Still, as the loss comes, we will gain new strength and a greater revelation of who our Heavenly Father truly is for us and in our lives.

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I sit on this chair or waiting. Today I leave this chair and surrender it to the Lord. God, I give you the seat of my heart. Come and sit in the midst of my heart and my life.

I pray that today, if like me, you find yourself going through some hard moments where it seems you just keep getting negative news, that you will stand up, take a deep breath and surrender all your cares to the Lord. He is real and He will never abandon us in our hardships. I pray that you will be confident and trust no matter what comes your way. I pray that I will have the ability to persevere no matter what comes our way and that the Lord will truly and absolutely be glorified in our lives and through our lives in Jesus Name. Amen and Amen.

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Friday, March 17, 2017


 Written by Angeline M Duran Santiago
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That’s where I find myself this week. 


Waiting to see what the changes in my son’s Lantus amount do or don’t do.

Waiting to
 see if changing his insulin from Apidra to Novolog again will make a difference.


Waiting to see if the Dexcom will come through again and what challenges I will go through when my son doesn’t wear another insert on his already marred body
We wait for so many things. We wait to see if those famous walks to find a cure really make a difference or if it’s just one more event for show. 

We wait to see if our children will feel better when we seek guidance from a new doctor. 

There is always something in our lives where we find ourselves either physically or mentally on line, at the door, waiting to see what will be the outcome.

Then there’s school. I’m waiting to see if my son will do better in school. Yet, he’s always feeling so horrible that school has become the last thing on his list of accomplishments. Sports have started to take a back seat and there are days he seems so far away. As a parent, I always feel guilty, like it’s my fault or I haven’t done enough. 

I try to become the cheerleader he needs to encourage him and push him with love but I regularly fail at my silly attempts. God knows, I want to try. I really do. I’m waiting to find the right way to nudge him, motivate him to believe in himself and return to a place where he is confident and believes he can do the impossible.

Here is where waiting takes another turn for me.
I am also a parent that has embraced each word found in scripture. Those words have become my personal life lines and my own encouragement while I wait.

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While I wait for the progress in my son’s health, I also wait on the Lord. God is an amazing friend who has provided me with words of hope. I’ve searched for promises that will keep me strong while I wait. I believe that these words will be an amazing resource for parents of not only children and teenagers who have Type 1 Diabetes, but for parents of any child who is dealing with a chronic illness or any physical condition where they are constantly dependant on any form of medical treatment.

 It’s hard, so very hard for our children, but it’s also hard, (though we rarely talk about it) for parents because we watch our children get better then deteriorate again. We watch them take steps towards recovery and we watch them fall again into painful situations where they seem to fall apart in our arms. We hold back tears. We don’t share our pain. We smile and say, “It’s ok. I have faith in God.” But, inside, we still fall apart when our children are hurting. 

And this is why it’s so important for me to write about my moments where I am waiting. It is in these times of pause that the stress is surrendered to my loving heavenly Father. My hurts and times where I feel incompetent and unworthy as a parent that God’s love reminds me that where I fail and lack, He gives me wisdom and empowers me to do my best.

Lord, I wait upon you. You are my strength and the One who guides me. Help me to be the parent my son needs. Strengthen me and grant me the wisdom and ability to know how to make the best decisions for my son. Show me how to inspire him and be example of your love and your goodness. 
Help other parents who struggle or go through hardships. You know those parents that live in the hospital with their kids. Be there present with them and hold them in your arms.
In Jesus name, Amen.

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Psalms 130:5-6 “I wait for the LORD,  my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.”

Isaiah 40:31   but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Micah 7:7   But as for me, I will look to the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me.

Psalms 37:7   Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!

Therefore, return to your God, Observe kindness and justice, And wait for your God continually.

Thursday, March 16, 2017


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Written by Angeline M Duran Santiago

I’ve wanted to write about so many things lately. Time has not been on my side. My stories are not few. I believe that God always gives us just the right moment to pen our thoughts and our cares. To me, each moment I write is therapy in my mind and in my heart. My words are sometimes prayers and declarations of faith and trust in a God that is greater than my circumstances. My words are sometimes opportunities to share my heart, when it’s strong and when it’s crying out to God.

Today I feel the burden of wanting to be a better mom. The many thoughts in my mind can easily make me feel like I’m not doing enough- although I know in my heart I am trying to do so much more. I’ve tried to give my kids all I thought they needed. It’s never been in my agenda to provide materials things as proof of my love. I’ve never believed in using things to validate my love. No matter what we give our kids, I don’t believe they ever feel we’ve given enough of what they feel they should’ve gotten from me as a mother. And then, there are moments like those I experience daily where I’m told I’m just too on top of them and need to pull away.
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As the parent of a Type 1 Diabetic, I’ve tried providing support and taking care of my son from the sidelines. I could see the frustration on his face each time I reminded him to check his sugar or if he has given himself insulin and the faces told me, “Mom, please, I know!” I know he knows but even though he knows perhaps as much or more than those wonderful Diabetes Educators, he still falls short of completing the daily tasks of doing things on time. He still gets carried away with the games or his friends and yes, believe it or not, and maybe most parents can agree, he forgets to give himself insulin and doesn’t remember until he’s feeling sick and his sugars have spiked.

Then, I lovingly go and remind him that I had asked him to do it a while back and these moments seem to build a wall between us. Anger lays down bricks that separate us. I try to back down and give him space but when I do, I see the things that need to be in order become chaos. It all falls on me because I have to be the one to make sure he is feeling well and taking care of himself. He wants to be big and show me he has it under control. My world is being shaken and he can’t see the damage he is accumulating each time he wants to live as if T1D was not a part of his world. But, it is. I keep praying that God will completely heal him. I believe God is able to renew my son’s inner body and transform him. But, that is all in God’s time and in God’s will.

So, I write. I remind myself that God is still in control and that when His word says he has great plans for my son’s future, I still believe it is so. I write and remind myself that my son is still growing in many ways and that the Lord breaks down walls built through misunderstandings and frustrations when parents try to get their children to truly understand that what they tell them or ask them to do is for their benefit and that there are blessings physically and in so many ways to take care of themselves. I write and I encourage myself because I believe that when we ask God to guide us as parents, He is a God that answers and directs our paths. I believe God is interested in blessing the home and keeping families happy and strong. This is why I tell myself to wait upon the Lord. He will do something in my home with my son as he continues to find his way with the Type 1 Diabetes. I believe he is not alone and that the Lord will help him and the Lord will help me.

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As the parent of a T1D, I don’t always feel accomplished. I’m stressed and overwhelmed, especially at night when I want to go to sleep and my son hasn’t taken care of his needs. I’m the voice that bothers. I’m the presence that annoys. I’m the mom who cares and can’t sleep until he checks his sugar, covers himself with insulin or his pump or gets Lantus. He sees me as a pain in his rear, but God calls me to push through and continue to love him and do all I do with the greatest love inside of me. I continue to pray for wisdom and I keep praying for other parents who go through frustrating moments like I do. God is able to strengthen us and help us through the hard times.  He will be present to celebrate the good times with us as well. Until there is a cure and until God’s hands completely transform our sick children, may they hear our voices as loving and caring reminders of our love for their present health and their future success. May the Lord continue to bless parents like you that care a little extra but never give up. 

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Tuesday, December 20, 2016


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Written By Angeline M Duran Santiago

I don't think I have the sufficient words within me to magically ease a parent's heart when it is filled with concern for their sick child. I'd like to think that this morning, the very words I speak into your life, are the very words that God is speaking into mine. But, I am also very aware that many times, even when the Lord speaks into the chaos in our lives, the reality of what we see and feel remains. Like my mom says, "You can't cover the heavens with your hand." and well, It is what it is. Life.

Maybe like me, your sleeping hours are very rare and few. Being able to lay your body down on the bed for over four hours a day is a luxury. Perhaps, you're in a hospital. You sleep next to your child's bed, or at least attempt to, through all the noise, the crying, the machines beeping, and well, your mind unable to stop talking about what is going on with your child. We pray. We read God's Word. We hold on to, "Be still and know that I am God." Be still. Yes, Lord. Today, I will be still. Or, at least try to.

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I think when the Lord tells me to be still and know that He is God means that He wants me to be at ease, to rest, to take it easy and know that "He's got this." Being still means I let go of my racing heart and my worried thoughts and I let it all fall from my lap unto His. To be still means God wants me to totally rely upon Him because He is who He is. I am here believing in my heart that God is able to take care of everything, but inside, I still fail and I fail miserably. I know that what my son has and perhaps what your child has is what doctors call, (for a lifetime) and without a cure. Yet, when I read God's word in Matthew, I visualize every word and as the sick and those with all kinds of diseases and illnesses come before Him, I walk in that crowd and I push through like the woman with the issue of blood, and I lift up my son and cry out, "Jesus! You've healed them all! Wait! My son....My son....My son still needs your healing touch!"

Dear Mother and Father, I know that what you are going through today is not easy. I can say this because like you, I am not blind to my son's hurts, to his frustration and his cries. Like you, I know what it's like to pray and wait on the Lord. Like you, I know what it's like to stay up late at night and still have to go to work only a little while after you actually fell asleep to realize that alarm ringing is telling  you, "Get up, girl!"

So, what words can I write to ease your burden? "God really does care for our children."
What can I write to remind you it's going to be alright? "God hears. God sees. God is still able."
My mind is saying, "God, you're not going to come through." And then Faith steps in and pushes those declarations out of the way. "No matter what, Lord. I chose to believe. No matter if you deliver me and my son from the flames, still, I will not lose hope. I will not bow down with unbelief. I will not join the others and bow down when the music plays. The song that says, "Bow, you're defeated. Bow, you're done. Bow, God has forsaken you. Bow down, God is not going to deliver your son." I chose to be still and wait on the Lord. I chose to stand up tall and straight and say, "I know that My Redeemer lives!"

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It's been months since my son has been well. Healthy is not something I've seen for a while. He's a teenager and he has times when he is discouraged and just wants to be like any other regular teenager, with normal teen issues. I don't talk about it a lot because, well, sometimes I think that when we just complain and talk about our issues all the time, it's a sign that we want this attention and need the whole world to know, "Oh, pray for me. I got a paper cut." I don't want to be that person that is writing and taking photos of every little moment of my life or my child's life and making it public because I want you to look at me and see what I am going through. One thing that has not bee absent in my son's life is his infectious smile. His laughter has remained and continues to explode in our home. His joy is always strong, making us all aware of how faithful our God is. When I see my son smile, I see God moving in life, living in his body, and working all things for his good according to His riches in Glory.

When we think of God providing according to His riches in glory, many people associate it immediately with financial provision and blessing. Today I want to encourage you to embrace this verse and see it for a moment the way I do. God will supply from His storehouse an abundance of what He has provided on the cross. My God will supply health, restoration in the body, restore the cells and the areas in the body organs that have been affected through sickness. God will deliver. God will supply deliverance and new strength. Yes. God has healing and blessings as part of His riches in heaven. This is how I chose to see it. It may not be a correct theological viewpoint, but it is what keeps my heart believing when doctors can only give me negative news. God has an abundance for my son, for my children, and for your child as well.

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What do you need for your child today? What do you need for your life?

I pray that today you will be encouraged to see your child through the eyes of hope and faith. I know it is what it is and you see what you see. I do, too. I am not pretending or asking you to enter La-La Land as if the pain and the problems are not real. But, we can also embrace God's promises and declare them out loud. Speak them to your mind, your heart and your storm. Speak God's promises into your child. Do not faint. This is what the Lord speaks to my heart this morning. Be still. Wait. Believe. Don't faint. God is still moving in your child's life. Trust. Hold on. and Praise the Lord through this storm. Prepare your heart to thank Him and yes, worship Him through the storms to come.

I am writing and sharing because I know that there are many moms and dads out there like me that need a word of comfort and a word of encouragement. You're not publicizing every minute of your life on social media. You're not advertising every detail of your life because you need everyone to know every little moment of your life. I know that what your child has is not just another cold and you need to be hugged and reminded that God is hearing. I'm not talking about, "Pray for my child. Sneezed once last night."

 I'm talking to parents with serious health issues in the lives of their children, where being in the hospital is like being in your second home. I'm talking to parents that are praying and asking God, "Lord, did you forget my child?" I'm writing today to parents who see their child wasting away and the doctors don't have any answers. I am one of those parents and today I want you to know that God, the God of Heaven and Earth is interested in your child. You are not ignored. He listens. He is working on our behalf.

God is going to show up in our lives, in our circumstances and do a great thing.

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Thursday, November 17, 2016


By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Here I am again. We're not strangers and I am so glad you take the time to just sit here with me. Maybe you're having some coffee, like I am, or maybe just surfing the internet looking for something out here in this massive world of words to speak into your life.
"Failure," you correct me. "Speak into my failures."

Then I correct you in return. "It's not just you. I'm there many times as well." As a mom of a son with T1D, who has entered his teen years, I can say so many things are changing. Yes, maybe the hormones, the changes, the middle school years. It's all of that and then it's not. 

I have a great son. He's smart, respectful, and pretty awesome! Still, there are times I have just seen him lash out and say, "No!" He'll say, "No." when I re-enter his room with the pump, prepared and set once more, only a few minutes or hours after having placed a new site on him. Some say it's the heat. Others that he's just hot all the time. The infusion set's sticky piece just dies out and he's back to having to need it placed on him again. He gets tired. "It hurts, mom. Please." or, "Just give me Lantus. I'll go back on just syringes all day."

We're not trained or experts on how to deal with these moments. Encouragement is something that is easy when my son is out on the Football field. Boy, can I make those Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders look like yesterday's news. I mean, I am really one heck on a cheerleader for my Jacob. And then, reality returns, chaos appears and I don't have a shout, a dance or a word to share. 

When his sugar levels are not high, then they're low. When he's not drinking large amounts of water, he's looking for juice. There's always something. There's always room for chaos. Maybe we end up here sometimes for different reasons. We let go of our regular routines and care. I think sometimes we get tired of being on top of our kids and they're begging to left alone and be able to live like everyone else. 

Failure comes in the form of feeling like I'm not doing my best or maybe I didn't try enough. Failure, and I mean those high blood sugar moments when I imagine the worst come to make me feel like my son should've had a different mom. Maybe someone stronger or more courageous, or who could more easily kick his big butt when he gives her a hard time. 

Finishing my coffee and cheating on my diet with some crackers and cheese while everyone else is asleep, I smile and decide to not only speak to you, perhaps breaking night with me, but to myself as well. Yes, well, call me crazy, or a little crazy, I speak to myself, but, like I said, "It's for you, too."

"You are not a failure. You have not failed as a mom. Nope! Absolutely, No way!"

You may feel defeated and tired at times but you are none of the above. You are a great mom and you are doing the best you can. You are a great dad and you are working your hardest for your T1D child. The fact that you are present, says so much. The fact that you are on your child, reminding them what to do and going out of your way to help them, even when they get grouchy and don't want to hear it, says volumes.

Take that discouragement and that lie that you have failed and toss it in the garbage, and not the recycle bin. We don't want any other parents getting this junk. You're a great parent. We don't always know it all or what's best, but we try. You can't lay back and take it easy either because if not our kids will run us over. So, we got to keep it together, in control, focused and confident.

Jacob is has had some really crappy days lately. I'm getting ready to give a new doctor a try. My amazing son who has always excelled educationally has fallen behind at an alarming rate. He rarely feels well and at times I'm at a loss for words. What do I do, Lord?

I choose to worship the Lord in the midst of discouragement. I choose to stand firm and believe God's word. I choose to lean on the Lord and make His word a priority for in it I find strength, comfort, words to guide me and lift me up.

I choose to worship God through music, through songs, even at work, the songs are in the silence of my thoughts, but I am praising the Lord. I am battling and giving God thanks for what He has promised and done. I declare victory even when it seems far away and uncertain. I bless the Lord!

I speak hope into my heart and remind my mind that God is Awesome, Amazing and no matter what I see or feel, God is here, in my home, in my life and never unaware of my situation.  

I choose to trust in You, Lord. I wait upon Your mercies. I surrender everything that seems to be going downward in a spiral storm and really fast, I give it all to you. Give me wisdom to be the parent my children need. Give me insight and knowledge to make better choices and to have a heart that senses you when you lead and guide me. Have your way in our home, in my children's bodies and in their minds. 

In Jesus name. Amen.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Can You See My S.O.S.?

Written By Angeline M Duran Santiago

What do we do when we are faced with seeing our children in a continued state of sickness? What is the answer to their cries for help when we try and keep trying every piece of advice, doctor's counsel and what medical books tell us to do and still, we are left looking into the eyes of our child and see that we are a failure, no source of comfort and unable to lead them out of their pain?

I, myself have been on a roller coaster journey with my son, watching him on a downward spiral more than a steady line of improvement. I know the facts of what happens when a Type 1 Diabetic continues with high blood glucose. All those negative thoughts come into my mind and I look for ways to help my son have what is considered normal numbers. But, the truth is, one moment it's all good and another moment, it's crazy again! Being the parent of a child with Type 1 is hard because there are times I just wish it was me and not him. I can swear that there are times during the night or early morning when I feel really sick and something inside me tells me to get up because that is how my son is feeling. I rise up and go check on him, and exactly as I was feeling or dreaming, I find my son either in a terribly low sugar moment or throwing up in the bathroom with very high glucose.

That's where I wonder if anyone can see my "S.O.S.?" I'm crying out, "Save Our Ship!" I'm crying out, "Lord, do you see this? God can you hear us? Heavenly Father, are you here in this house with us or am I alone?" It is through these painful and hard situations that I've learned to detect when the enemy is present and begins to attack my children through sickness. It is in these moments when the thought, "God, are you still able to work in my situation?" is answered with a loud, "Yes! God can do anything! Just believe!" It is in the early hours of the morning when I've barely started to sleep and know that I have to get up in just a few minutes, that I have no other choice but to send out a heavenly S.O.S., a cry that comes from deep inside of me and I can't even speak it. But, God hears. Holy Spirit is present and sees and knows and feels what I am going through, but more importantly what my son is going through.


Are you sitting on the same ship with me this morning? Are you looking at the storm that rises around your child and inside your child's body as the fevers refuse to leave, the doctor's continue to send you home without an answer or diagnosis, and as your child continues to lie in bed, hurting and going through this madness? Then, you need to join me in rowing with me. Take the side and begin to row towards the Lord in faith and standing on His Word that He is able to visit our home and visit our children on this rainy day.

When you rise up with your sick child in the middle of the night, don't just take care of them with medicine and what they physically need. Begin to pray. My friend, pray. Talk tot he Lord and surrender your child to the Lord. Invite the Lord into your child's bedroom. Invite the Lord into your home. Sing a song of praise and worship the Lord through your whispers into the dark. As you walk back and forth from the kitchen to the bathroom and back to your child's room, cleaning up the vomit, making tea or getting medicine, continue to evict the sickness that has arrived and refuses to leave. Continue to pray and seek God's will. Fight with your worship. Fight with your praise. Bless your child in Jesus name. Pray over your other children as well.

A few days of peace and quiet in your home may mean the battle is over for a time. I've learned to acknowledge that the Enemy of our Souls doesn't stop planning against God's chosen, God's beloved and God's anointed ones. So, don't you and I stop seeking the Lord and being ready for the assault on our children.

Lord, I pray for my son, my kids and my family who are going through sickness. I know that these continued illnesses are not normal. So, I run to you. Can you see my S.O.S.? I know you can. I know I am not alone. I know you are in my home even when I am at work or on the road. I trust in you, Lord. When the answer comes quickly, and when it seems to be delayed. I know you're coming through. I trust in You, Lord. Through the rainy days inside my heart and the sunny times that come as well. I trust in Your power to heal my son, to restore and make all things new. I write to affirm this as my reality. I write it down as my confession and my sure hope. I trust in Your Promises.


If you need prayer or just need to share, I would love to pray with you, for your home or just listen. I love it when others share and we encourage one another in the Lord. God bless you greatly.

#type1diabetic  #t1d  #Type1  #highglucose  #sickchild   #prayingparent  #prayingmom  #prayinggrandma,  #hopeagain  #sickness #faith  #hope  #holdon   #Godheals  #Godlistens  #Jesusheals, #s.o.s., #SOS  #helpforhurting, #Godhelps

Friday, July 1, 2016


 Written by Angeline M Duran Santiago

We all want our children to love us. The words, "I hate you!" and just not the love language we wake up each day looking forward to hearing. I want to hear things that puff me up inside like, "You're the best mom!" "I love you!" and "Yes." The truth is, for many parents like myself, with now a teen who is living day to day with Type 1 Diabetes, the responses are not always the ones "I" want to hear. So, if you're a parent with a child who has a daily chronic condition, be prepared for some reality. I hope that at some point in your life, (maybe not, and I truly hope so) you will get the kind of response that screams, "I hate you!" but just grow some thick skin and do it anyway.

1- Did you check your blood glucose before eating?

I know that my son looks at me sometimes like, "Really, mom? Not again!" I know he gets tired of the questions. The fact is that even though he will say it got done, when we go to the doctor's visits, the proof is in the paperwork. Numbers don't lie. Your child may want to be left alone and tell you that they're going to prove they are responsible. I don't want you to think I am that kind of parent that exasperates her child and doesn't let them breathe. Honestly, I give my son freedom to do a lot on his own. I don't want to ever be that parent that hears, "I hate you!" or "Leave me alone." but, it happens when we want to make sure the medication is being taken on time and correctly. My experience is that at the end of the day, even if the blood sugar was checked, many times it doesn't get entered correctly or on time, which takes me to point number 2.

2- Did you enter your blood glucose and carbs into the pump? Or, did you cover yourself correctly?

"Yes." A hundred times the response is "yes". Fact is if the sugar levels are just not going down, most likely your child has been very busy with their extremely busy teenage life and demands and he or she forgot (oops, did I say that?) yes, forgot to put in those numbers that help the pump come up with the correct dosage of insulin needed to cover the meal your child is about to have and/or supply the needed dose of insulin to keep your child's sugar level where it needs to be. Listen, your child may get upset you asked again but you can go to sleep confidently and know your child's body has been taken care of because you loved enough to ask.

3- Do you have everything you need with you?

Most likely, I am the only parent in the world that goes through this, so forgive me for sharing. Maybe you have never and will never go through that moment where you're in the car, maybe running a few minutes late for school and work, everyone gets in and just as you get a few minutes into your commute, in the back of the car someone says, "I left my pump home." or "I forgot my blood glucose kit." or "Oh, shit, my insulin and my lunch stood on the kitchen table!" My worst perhaps has been when I was half way to work and while I am getting on the bus my son would text me from the train station to tell me he was feeling sick and had left what he needed home.

This is why I am going to say it over and over again. Yes, even if he gets upset. I will keep asking and checking. Your child will say, "Yes!" to everything in the rush to get to their football game or their activity after school. Your child will think they've packed correctly before heading out to the beach or the party with their friends. Your child will swear they have taken everything in their bag and I'm telling you, most of the time- something is missing. So, even if they hate you for that never ending question, ask it again and again. Not because you want to be a nag or a pain in the nalgas, but because you love your child and want their physical life to be filled with strength, health and great joy!
4-The famous text or phone call

Some parents just plain want to know where their kids are. I know where my child is and I don't think that has ever been my issue. I set limits and boundaries and give my kids the trust so that they make good choices in regards to friends and places they visit. Since they've been big enough to understand, I've talked to them about being careful with the places they go and what they do because they belong to a heavenly Father who loves them and wants the best for them. I engrave in my children that they are to live their lives to honor God and live by those guidelines in Scripture. 

So, why the text or the phone call? I know that my son has needed the reminder when he's been a game or a sleepover. I know that he can get wrapped up in football or fun with his friends and he may not want to take out his glucose kit to check his sugar in front of his friends. Your child may not want anyone to see them with their pump on when going inside the swimming pool and they take it off. So, it's up to us to remind them that the pump has to stay on and if they take it off, to do so carefully. They need to follow their doctor's instructions on how to pause the insulin pump temporarily. 

5- Create a To-Do List

This one is short and simple. Organize what has to get done, especially for going to school set up. If your child knows what to pack, what to put away, and what to do, maybe, just maybe, your morning will be a lot easier and your child's day will not be stressful. Sometimes, kids forget. Being a teenager doesn't mean they get wiser overnight. Even adult forget. So, if this "to do list" is just for you and me as a parent, let's make sure it's available for everyone in the home.

6- Everyone needs to know

This one is not up for discussion. Everyone in your home needs to know what to do in case of an emergency if the blood glucose drops to really low or sky rockets to extremely high. I don't need panic around me, I need problem solvers who know what to do. Believe it or not, little children can learn what to do. My kids knew what to do if their younger brother had highs or lows, or at least I can say, they knew the emergency protocol of checking sugar, getting juice or something sweet, getting water, giving insulin, call 911, call mom, etc. Close family and friends, and especially teachers and coaches need to be very aware of any chronic condition your child has. They need to know the warning signs of low blood sugar or high blood sugar. They need to know why your child needs a water break or a moment to check their blood glucose after exercising. 

Communication is so important. Your child may say, "Oh, you're embarrassing me by telling everyone!" So, be a parent that will take each step with wisdom and prayer. Don't blurt it all out in front of nosy parents and neighbors. Be discreet and be selective with who you speak. Choose the right time and place. I like to write things out and add some information printed out with my contact details for teachers and coaches. Teach your child that they need to share somethings with at least that special friend they spend most of their time with. Your child may be out riding their bicycle or running and suddenly feel sick. If their friend is not aware of the signs for low or high blood sugar, that friend may not know to get help or what to "ASK" or "Tell" your child to check. They need to know about reaching out to you or an adult for help. Honestly, my son used to really hate when I asked him, "Does your friend know you have Type 1 Diabetes- just in case of an emergency?" It was until there was such an emergency during football camp last year that I think he understood the importance of sharing our lives with people in our lives. So, sorry to repeat this again, but everyone that should know, needs to know.


Okay, okay, so maybe your child is not going to hate you, just get angry sometimes. I've been afraid many times to keep talking to my son because he just looked upset. Truth is, he's just as overwhelmed and tired as I am. Still, if I'm going to really help my son create healthy habits and routines that will help him succeed as he matures and continues through his teen years and into adulthood, I have to keep being that person in his life that will always ask what's going on and what hasn't been done in his life in regards to his daily care. Type 1 Diabetes is not easy. There are good days and really sucky days. Sometimes everything is going fine and other times, well, I just feel like the bad guy. But, we have to stick to our guns like they say and make sure our kids have reminders that don't show us out to be nagging parents, but just loving and concerned enough that at the end of the day we still get what I love to get most from my son, that beautiful smile and his amazing hugs.
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